With universal No. 1 Southern California seemingly certain to reach the national championship game — those Arizona State and Oregon obstacles look smaller and smaller all the time — the real drama lies with the unfolding derby between the Southeastern and Big 12 conferences. Which of these leagues, each stocked with multiple top-10 teams, will supply the Trojans’ competition?

With no offense to the great offenses of Missouri, Oklahoma and Texas, here’s hoping it’s the SEC.

Although we generally agree with the sentiment—in other words, we’d love to play in the title game against an SEC opponent—we always get a little nervous when the Trojans’ appearance in said title game becomes a foregone conclusion. Especially when that happens in September.

A few years ago, ESPN created the perfect drug for the general college football degenerate: College Gameday Live, a once-a-week quality-produced show that is not only insightful but also entertaining. Needless to say, I quickly became a regular weekend user. But after growing accustomed to the euphoria of this early Saturday morning show, it would take months for me to come down and re-enter normal civilian life. I considered this a good thing. A once-a-week user. It didn’t affect my life negatively and I could only convince myself of the positives. I’ve now realized it was only a gateway.

The geniuses at ESPN, knowing my addiction, decided to street College Football Live—the crack to College Gameday Live’s cocaine. They have helmet contests and sound offs. They rotate anchors, giving any columnist who has ever written an article in a major publication a chance to give his thoughts on why the grass (actual grass, not the mary jane) in Florida seems to blow out as many ACLs as Joe Pa does birthday candles, along side an over-hyped, overrated College player who never did anything at the next level, so he can say things like “Well, when I played” or “Back when my coach [fill in the blank]”. Every day, some player that’s in line to be placed on the mantle of over-hyped tell us he and his team are going to take it one game at a time.

But here’s the catch, the thing about crack: I can’t stop watching it. I watch it nightly as soon as I get home, like a jonesin’ junkie. I need to watch FSU beat USC in a helmet on-line vote off. (Really? It doesn’t help that it airs when we’re still at work and they’re already a few drinks past happy hour.) I need to watch unwatchable Sound Off smack running videos. I need it until College Gameday Live returns in three weeks (and even then I’ll still probably watch). I simply need it.

Please—if anyone has any good cures for getting me off this crap until the good pure rush of College Gameday Live returns, I’ll gladly take it.

Please feel free to post suggested cures in the comments.

the administrative tribunal of the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has ruled that the local USC has priority of use when it comes to the “SC” logo, including the interlocking version.

The battle between the USCs has been quietly raging since 2002, when USC challenged South Carolina’s application to federally register a version of the “SC” trademark for use on clothing and baseball uniforms. South Carolina fired back with a counterclaim to cancel USC’s federal trademark registration for its interlocking “SC” logo.

We would’ve called South Carolina “the other USC” regardless, but it’s still nice to have some legal backing.

The record speaks for itself. The Trojans:

• Own 11 national titles in five different decades.
• Own the highest all-time winning percentage vs. NCAA opponents of any conference (.704). That percentage ranks seventh among all Division I schools.
• Own a winning record vs. every Pac-10 team, ranging from 55-8-4 (Washington State) to 42-28-7 (UCLA).
• Own a winning record vs. every other BCS conference, including a 17-10-1 mark vs. the SEC.
• Own a 30-16 record in bowl games (.652). Those 30 wins rank second all-time to Alabama, which has 31.
• Own seven wins over No. 1-ranked teams, second only to Notre Dame’s eight.

History? It’s not just one great coach; it’s four: Howard Jones, John McKay, John Robinson and Pete Carroll.

Clutch teams also produce clutch performers: Seven Heisman Trophy winners.

And so on. Anyway, if nothing else it’s nice to have that edge over the SEC.

3. Pac-10: For years, USC has been king of the mountain with everyone else looking up. However, last year Stanford and Oregon gave them a good shove but could not knock them down as the Trojans were back in the Rose Bowl beating up on another Big Ten team.

This year Arizona State, with Rudy Carpenter at QB are the biggest threat to the Trojan throne and can make some noise on the national scene if they can knock of the Georgia Bulldogs on September 20. Oregon should have the best defense in the conference outside of USC and will be solid again, UCLA will only get better under Rick Neuheisel, and California and Oregon State are tough outs.

In terms of players we see for the combine, the best-conditioned and prepared athletes by conference come in this order: the SEC, the Big 12, the Pac-10 is just a little bit under that, and then the Big Ten brings up the rear.

[Mark Sutton, strength coach at D1 Sports Training] casually framed one of the only rational explanations for the persistent and partially inaccurate perception of the SEC speed myth/Big Ten Sloth Legend: The emphasis on speed training, explosive Olympic-style movements in the weight room, and a noticeable bleedover between the disciplines of track and field and football.

Doesn’t that sort of support the speed myth? And then there’s this:

Bringing us to the thorny point of talent development. Tossing out kooky, unempirical theories such as hot weather making players faster or WOO-WEE DEM SOUTHERN BOYZ KEN RUN, you’re left with what happens to the players after they get to the program. In the SEC, the emphasis will be developing the player’s speed. According to some trainers, the top Big Ten programs focus more on adding muscle.

The difference a training program makes may be marginal when you compare the uniformly elite talent recruited by top college programs, but margins are where smallish teams like West Virginia beat teams like Oklahoma in bowl games, and where Ohio State might lose a crucial step on the edge in high-profile debacles against SEC teams.

So … if the SEC focuses on speed and the Big Ten focuses on strength, then wouldn’t that, well, tend to make the SEC faster? We’re obviously not interested in advocating for the speed myth, but this article seems to explain it, not debunk it.

10. Mark Mangino begins a rigorous pre-season fitness regimen.
9. OU cheerleaders scramble to memorize the words to Boomer Sooner.
8. Nerds across the country prepare for twelve weeks out of the shadows as they don Micheal Jackson-esque pseudo-military uniforms to march in the band.
7. A Northwest Florida cryogenics lab begins de-icing Bobby Bowden.
6. Joe Paterno starts sundowning.
5. BYU embraces its African-American population (may also be an indicator of the start of college basketball, or track, or baseball, or hockey).
4. Los Angeles County Superior Court places priority on the probation hearings of the USC backfield.
3. Schools like Boise State escape safety school obscurity and begin to matter.
2. Perennial powerhouse Notre Dame prepares for a daunting schedule against such formidable opponents as San Diego State, Stanford (err, wait a minute), and Navy.
1. Louisiana increases to the 49th most desirable state as LSU makes a run at another championship.

Speaking of nonconference games … the winner of USC-Ohio State on Sept. 13 will play for the BCS title. It’ll be a Trojan conquest. That difference-in-speed thing again.

Haven’t we dealt with the speed myth before? Anyway, despite their team speed, Bradley thinks the Trojans will fall to the Dawgs in said title game.

Have I forgotten anybody? Oh, yeah — that team from Athens. The Bulldogs will go 11-1 — the loss will be at Auburn, not at Arizona State or at LSU — and will win the SEC East. Then they’ll beat the Tigers in the Dome for the conference title. Then they’ll beat USC in Miami for the national championship. Then Michael Adams will say, “You know what? This BCS deal really isn’t so bad.”

In years past, I would obviously have quibbled with Bradley’s prediction of the winner of the title game. But given the apparent lack of killer instinct lately, and the general pall that hangs over the program nowadays, I’m not so sure.

• A judge ruled that Reggie Bush must quit stonewalling and must testify.
• O.J. Mayo was reported to have taken $30K in cash and gifts.
• DeMar DeRozan (second-highest rated basketballer ever to sign with the school) is reconsidering after the Mayo incident.
• That ridiculous youtube video with Brendan Carroll f-bombing the walk-ons has exploded all over the Internets.
• Lofa Tatupu, one of the few USC products who hasn’t been an utter disaster, got a DUI.

Just to repeat: that’s JUST THIS WEEK.

I hear about it nonstop: USC’s athletic department is worse than Ohio State’s, worse than Florida State’s, worse than Miami’s, USC is an SEC school and not in a good way, lack of institutional control, inmates running the asylum, a school without any shred of integrity, etc.

Maybe it’s because I have two kids now and going to the games isn’t quite as logistically easy as it once was, but I’m giving serious thought to selling my season tickets and staying home this season. (And yes, I know that doesn’t hurt the athletic department, but at least karma-wise it might if my tickets go to the opposing fans at each game). Based on the goodwill of a few great teams, they have jammed the entire community with higher ticket prices and a raw deal, and now every SC alum gets to walk into the office every day and hear about how they went to school at “The Program” and are basically one notch above SMU.

If there’s another way to file some kind of protest, I’m all for it … not that the school would give a damn, but still. Anyone associated with the school who has any interest in sports whatsoever should be embarrassed by it.